We All Grieve

All grief is the same, yet different at the same time. 

Read that again….slowly. Think about it. Feel it. Remember it. 

“But you lost your sister and I lost my child.” “Your mom died, I lost my husband.” Whatever the scenario, it doesn’t matter…it’s still the same. Don’t get me wrong, circumstances and relationships make each loss unique, but the feelings are the same.

How so? You ask. How is losing your spouse the same as losing a parent the same as losing a sibling? Well, it all comes down to the word grief.

Grief is defined as a deep and poignant distress caused by (or as if by) bereavement. 

Whenever we lose someone we love, no matter the relation, we feel a deep sadness, or distress. The void that the lack of their presence leaves is a gaping hole that we feel through the core of our being. All the memories, the could have beens, and the should have beens, that bring floods of tears apply in every loss.

The next time you feel tempted to compare your loss as more than another person’s, take a moment to stop and think about it. You may have lost your best friend in a spouse, theirs might have been the parent they just lost. The loss of presence and companionship that you have felt, they are feeling as well. It just looks different. 

I have said before, grief looks different on different people at different times of the day. I want to add “in different ways” to that. Everyone grieves differently, sure. But we also grieve the same way…..deeply.

All grief is the same, yet different at the same time.